Monday, February 8, 2010

Skate or Die!


This is an example of a dude who like an unwashed chamois probably stuck around too long in the 4's.
Here are his Cat4 results in 2009:
12/38, 12/34, 5/39, 3/27, 3/26, 3/28, 1/11* Nov1, 3/40, 3/25.

After a string of four top 5's, he breaks through with a win at Sunflower Cross on November 1st. This is probably where he should've moved on up and made room in the 4's for the next bagger. To his credit, he often doubled up and did the 3/4's which further showed that he was more than ready to get out of the beginner's class. And it does appear that he CTFU to 3 at the start of 2010. But r5 reserves the right to retroactively call out baggers.

On a 'bagger scale of 1-10, he scores a 6.8. Bonus point for the cool tattoos and not looking like your typical cycling douchebag.

Friday, February 5, 2010

KC Sandbagger internet meme weekender edition


Someone suggested that I call this dude out but crossresults must be busted because I can't find his results. So instead, we'll do dopplegangers and urban dictionary entries since its all the rage.

Urban Dictionary entry for JB:

1. To trip over a barrier:
Dude I got so wasted last night that I JB'd over that hooker when I got up in the middle of the night to read Kc Sandbagger.

2. To incessantly jibber jabber while others are trying to concentrate:
Dude I missed my damn callup because my teammate wouldn't stop JBing and made me accidently slather Mad Alchemy on my nuts.

3. To completely blow:
Dude I was tryin to hang with Marshall and the boys up Renner but completely JBed and pretended like I got a flat.

Thursday, February 4, 2010

Race of the Year?

Kansas State Championships

Cold, wet and sloppy?

Or

Topeka HPT Grand Prix

Hot, fast and dry?

Which was your favorite race of the year?
I know how your wife likes it.

Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Steve V.


Dunno nothin about his bike handling skills but it appears as though he can handle a triple axe.

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Monday, February 1, 2010

Kansas City is King of the B's


You usually don't go accusing Cat1's of sandbagging because what are they supposed to CTFU to next? There aint no Chuck Norris CX category yet.

But still, you can't help but raise an eyebrow when you check the results of the so called "B" race at cross nationals and find that the winner is a Cat1. Second place was also a Cat1, but the rest of the top 10 finishers were 2's and 3's. So either he should not be in a race labelled as "B" and he was big time baggin, or they need to better define what "B" means. Its a question that others have brought up as well.

We all know what "B" means for the roadies out at the Tuesday nighter. For others, "B" means trolling the 2AM crowd at Blonde for some fat drunk chick to take home because the ladies at Biggs weren't havin it. And for r5, "B" means bustin out the Butt'r and Barelylegal-dot-com because his Real Doll sprung a leak.

As I understand it, Cat1 is elite. And it appears as though there is an "Elite" class and an "Open" masters class at nationals so you get to do more than one race with all that travel. At least he didn't pump his damn fist like a certain ex-pro did for winning the B's at Tiffany Springs in 08.

So F-it, maybe KC should dust off Tilford and send him to Oregon next year and make it three in a row. He could probably win the B's on a Huffy with two flat tires.

Sunday, January 31, 2010

I hate steering



This tri-geek must be allergic to his handlebars...

Spring Fling is just around the corner and with that brings a new crop of potential baggers. For some folks, this is their "A" race- an early peak in hopes of scoring cheap upgrade points. For others, its a great chance to get a one day license and "start over" as a Cat5 and win a neat little ribbon by stomping on the fresh meat. Yeah, you know who you are.

Normally r5 encourages upgrading out of the 5's as soon as you get your 10 starts and aren't getting dropped. But there are some that no matter how fast they are, should NEVER be allowed in a race because they did not bother to learn how to steer. Lets hope that chainring to the forehead he got from riding like an idiot and crashing out a whole mess of riders in his first 3/4 race keeps this guy from coming back again.