Summers Time and the Baggin is Easy

Summers-sausage has 2 full seasons of cross and multiple top 5's stuffed under his skinsuit and had the nerve to line up for a third as a cat4 at Manions. He porked the field like a cathlic priest at an all you can eat butt-fet and r5 only hopes those poor cat4 beginners were using chamois cream. Bro its time to CTFU.

Theres one less sweet ass to distract you from the lap counter this year.
On a sad note to open the season, r5 wants you all to crack open Gu gel and pour a little for homey who won't be at the starting line any more due to some shady back alley dealings by some USACK-less buttheads. Though she's hard to miss, Magretta will truly be missed this year. CX is a hard sport to score and when it aint done right all you bitches get your crossresults score bloated. Magretta did it right even though she left us all deaf and freezing at the line. Now you assholes will only have your wives left to yell at you on sundays to take the trash out.

El Baggero

After winning last friday at that fucked up Longview course Hi-me! has put another stamp in his passport to Cat3. Take a look at his results from the past year:
Police Academy 10/46
Longview 1/35
Wichita 3/25
Wichita 2/36
Gateway 5/100
Gateway 3/100
Missouri state 6/33
Sunflower 1/31
If you stack this dudes Cat4 results end to end they would cover the entire border fence. Time for USAC to come knockin at the door and upgrade this homey!

So r5 heard the Police Academy course was 10 times better than everybody thought it would be. Sometimes if you pull your head out of your suburban asses maybe you will see there is whole new world outside the Lenexa industrial park. That said, r5 hopes the Cliff Drive, KCK, and OP races make a come back some day. This fatboy has dropped many a weenie on gooseneck hill and looks forward to doing the same saturday.

Coming to a town near you!

Cherry Pickin' Daddies

Featuring two ex pros lapping a bunch of hillbillies who think threshold is what you work the cornfields with and then leading out their slow ass teammate to complete the podium sweep! Rated-R for REALLY-LAME!

So Tradewhine, why weren't you guys in St Loser getting your buttwhuppins like Merci did?

And BTW was there a good reason why TNW got cancelled last night!?!? Coulda run a senior wheelchair crit before we even got a DROP OF RAIN. AND WHO CARES IF IT RAINS? Plenty of dudes got wet out at the crit when NEET was running it...

2 Legit

Say what?? If Jb is a 2, then the entire Crashovita squad is continental pro. Dude probably thinks palmares are what he squirts lotion on before gettin on the internet.

**r5 still promises the year end Sandbaggies awards...

Hosed!

Before we begin the year end awards, a little housekeeping is in order. Dr Stinkfinger gave up a sweet powerwasher by CTFU'ing for his last race of the year. All he had to do was simply show up for the 4's and he would've won that series. That would be like r5 skipping another round at the Ameristar buffet. But instead, he raced and placed mid-pack in his first Cat3 race and learned that there were plenty of plump rumps in the new category he could easily ogle and drop. Most impressive. Props to him for CTFUing!!

Enjoy the powerwasher, JW. Time for you to CTFU!

Stay Tuned

For the first annual KC Sandbagger "Sandbaggies" awards!

Dr Stinkfinger

Colonchecks been trollin the 4's far too long and r5 has a few guesses as to why. Dude has two FULL seasons of 'cross under his belt with a total of over 20 races and most recently a couple wins where he totally annihilated the field. New year= new license- time to CTFU Coloncheck. There's plenty of plump rumps in the 3's to check out.

On a bagger scale of 1-10, this dude scores a 9.5 . +1 for rollin carbon tubbies in the 4's. -1 for old school steel. -0.5 for the wookie fur legs.

KC Sandbagger bonus: pick out the 2nd bagger in this photo!